Sunday's showdown between Manchester United and Ch

Stop me if you've heard this one before. The league's two best teams of the past five years are going toe to toe and elbow to neck this weekend in a potentially title-deciding match overflowing with history, emotion,gucci jeans, meaty challenges, mind games and Fernando Torres. Manchester United Jerseys Sunday's showdown between Manchester United and Chelsea contains many of the same elements of the massively hyped Barcelona-Real Madrid Clasico, but thankfully we won't have to endure the ridiculous playacting and coaching machismo-fest that turned their recent spate of matches into an El Fiasco. After all, everyone knows that in England players don't dive and roll around on the ground clutching their faces. Right, Nani? "I find it shameful," said my friend Luke Dempsey, the most rabid United fan I know. "But it's not like Chelsea doesn't engage in their share of theatrics. Anyone remember how they tried to decapitate the referee after losing the Champions League semifinal to Barcelona a couple of years ago?"
It is safe to say that Luke and Paul will never enjoy a Prince William-and-Becks level of soccer bromance. For starters, we're talking about grown men whose psychic well-being hinges on whether David Luiz can cope with the darting runs of Javier Hernandez better than John Terry did in the two CL games. Both friends have suffered for their team from the cradle, with Luke born and bred in Manchester and Paul growing up in London under the spell of Chelsea's Peter legends, Osgood and Bonetti.Chelsea Jerseys Even though he's lived in America for 20 years, Luke still has season tickets to Old Trafford, while Paul recently paid a guy $450 to drive him from Manchester back to his hotel in London after last month's second leg of the Chelsea-United Champions League fandango. "That's a ludicrous comparison," countered my friend Paul Kanarek, the most unhinged Chelsea fan in my address book. "There's a big difference between losing your cool after being cheated out of a place in the Champions League final due to a referee's incompetence and flopping to the ground at the first sign of a slight breeze."
So in search of a clear-eyed perspective on Sunday's game, I sought out Luke and Paul to each handicap his respective team's chances. The tension at my local pub, Kinsale Tavern, was at DEFCON Housewives of New Jersey level, but they agreed to let me referee their Bile Bowl if I bought the beer. After wishing their teams equally bad luck -- in case I haven't mentioned it in a few sentences, Arsenal is reduced to playing for the honor of third place -- the verbal throwdown began. Many of their comments have been redacted as they are neither suitable for a family website nor anatomically possible to perform.Soccer Jerseys From China The opening barbs consisted mostly of Luke yelling "Look at the bleedin' scoreboard," while recounting the number of European and EPL trophies gathering dust in Manchester and gently reminding Paul why Chelsea wouldn't be appearing at Wembley this year. After Paul mentioned Luke's questionable biological heritage, he countered that the Blues weren't the same lifeless bunch that lost to United home and away in their Champions League battle.